REI started up one of its semi-regular clearance sales today, but aside from a few decent looking deals on winter boots, it doesn’t look like there’s all that much to get psyched about. Unless you want a pair of poorly-reviewed snowshoes or an in-tent electric fan (WTF?).

I’m still kicking myself for missing a great deal on a one-person ultralight tent on their last clearance, so now I check the web site IMMEDIATELY when I get REI’s email notice. I’m such a good little consumer, I am. But, after a few minutes of obsessive clicking, I stumbled upon what might be the single greatest outdoor item ever unleashed on an unwitting public: Gnome Tent Pegs.

Yes, they are exactly what they sound like — tent pegs made to look like David the Gnome after taking too much colloidal silver.

And yes, the gnomes ARE inflatable — so you can also use them as pillows or, as the web site recommends, companions on your next solo trip.

Of course, using these may be the reason why you’re taking so many solo trips in the first place.

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